Odds and Ends

The weather is SOooooo freaking hot recently I can't think properly. Yea, I'm about to enter a new phase of my life next Monday- as a working ADULT. Dad asked me how I felt. Seriously, nothing? I don't know...I don't even feel excited about my convocation(I thought I would be when I was somewhat younger.)As I said, it's too hot to think.



Chinese New Year is over and somehow this year is totally not festive at all to me. Well, except for the baking part. So I'll skip over CNY. Just thankful that all my family members are still intact for another year(Even though popo fractured her kneecap and is undergoing a slow process of recovery).I've grown to appreciate life more as I grow throughout this few years. Humans are just fragile things.Every breath counts and our lifespan is in God's hands.



Since last Friday, I now wake up at 6.55am everyday and go over to my grandparents'house when ah gong goes for his morning walk. I figured it's just not healthy for him to cope around in the stressful situation without breathing any fresh air and it's not right for a person who exercises everyday to stop so suddenly. In the time being,I've picked up some simple cooking skills whilst helping out in the kitchen.

It's really not easy being a housewife after all. I guess God wanted me to learn something. I always used to think I would make a good homemaker. Apparently, it takes a lot of patience and love. Something that needs to be trained. I have love, but lack patience sometimes.

It's not that simple having to take care of the elders around the house as well. A will demand this at the same time B is wanting another few things done. And I'm not the one having to take care of the other cleaning jobs.(There's a helper hired to clean their house every fortnight). I'm plain stressed and my back is breaking just by doing a few simple cleaning and tidying jobs, cooking and running around.


Add on a baby and the basic house cleaning errands and I'd seriously be flat on the ground.



At first I was thinking maybe God wanted to show me my weak spots and another way out. That I was not destined to play this kind of role in the future.(Everyone knows my dream is to have my own family right?)That PERHAPS I could be a super powerful independent and hire people to provide for my immediate family's needs. Then I got a bit excited. After all this God wants me to become a 女强人? OH YES~!!!! That will show them! All those people who looked down their noses and told me I'd never be able to live independently for long.



FINALLY~!!!

But *sigh~a little voice inside me spoke and I was given this question "Why don't you think of all this as a training ground to prepare you to become a better person in the future whatever role you may play?"

Hmmmm~ Come to think of it. That sounds more logical than all my wild ideas of being a successful ehem~ career woman.(Don't boo me k? )

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My "bright" future aside, it's time to focus on the present. Felt a bit hurt a while back when I read someone's blog. 2009 marked the first time the person forgot my birthday in dunno how many years. And then, I don't know what to feel if you're not considered among 15 other people the person called in CNY. Yea, maybe somethings might have passed. But what never changed was I'm still the simple me. And he's well,got a bit proud.

I'm saying this from a very neutral perspective as I shared with Mable. You see, I have no cause to envy him at all coz what he has is never what I wanted. I never had big dreams and never will. But he's gotten somewhat proud and big for his boots(for no apparent reason as I see)since he's gotten as far as he stands right now. I don't get it. Why did you change? What have you got to be proud of? Why can't you be simple and happy as before?Every time we contact, it's just so far away now. I feel our friendship is drifting apart and it seems like we can't be friends forever. Someday, you'll forget me.

And yea, speaking of friends forever reminds me of something. I hate it when people are dumb enough to use Caps Lock when they type but never realise that putting letters in Capitals indicate a different tone - the way you address people, ie. annoyed manner, or giving out some order or simply just plain freaking barking mad at someone.



DO YOU KNOW THERE IS SUCH A THING AS "Netiquette"? And yea, I don't bother to respond when people are rude. Intentionally or unintentionally. I'm O.F.F.E.N.D.E.D.(Get it?)I mean, unless you are illiterate la...then of coz that's forgivable.

But then, it's never too good to dwell too much on what's not good right? Must be positive. So let's skip these negative topics for now.

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I'm still confused about something. I don't know what to think. And as I quote from my funny younger sister, "You will know when another choice is eliminated". (Okay fine she didn't put it THIS way, it was in fact a lot more direct but I prefer to disclose this matter and not make it public). Oh well, Almighty Maker, whatever will be will be.